Abortion: A Moral Dilemma

Abortion is one of the most controversial issues that I have ever come across because it poses the very question of murder.  Is it murder? Or is it justifiable?  We search for the answers through political and religious perspectives, and then when that fails we turn to science to justify or discredit ones views.  I think it is a necessary process in many cases, of which cases and reasons: I can not judge someone else on their decision.  Who am I to tell someone that they should or should not have an abortion?  To me it boils down to choice, as many other things so often do.
What pains me to the core, is that once a woman becomes pregnant, suddenly she is considered a "second class citizen", and her life is less important that the fetus.  That, to me, is appalling. My opinion on the matter tends to collide with the opinions of everyone I know.  I do not consider whether or not it is murder, while the child is still a fetus.  Once past the first trimester I consider an abortion to be illogical and wrong.  But within the first trimester, when it is so easy to miscarry, I find it perfectly reasonable to have an abortion. Not everyone shares my point of view, according to many, its murder from conception. But consider that a miscarriage is very likely during the first three months, due to all kinds of reasons.  The answer I get is "well it wasn't meant to be." or the ever popular "It didn't fall into God's plan."  So its perfectly fine for God to kill unborn children, as he did first born sons in the biblical times.
To me, its not a matter of religion, and I think it folly for anyone to turn to the bible for morale. If you ever actually read the bible, you would see it littered with tales of horror and unjust deaths and rapes, etc. etc.
Everyone has their opinion on abortion. And everyone is right to an extent. I think it all comes down to: Can you live with the decision you make?  As long as you do not go around bombing abortion clinics with your idealistic self  then I definitely respect your opinion.
Out of curiosity, I posted the question of abortion in my status update on Facebook.  I received a lot of responses, of which I can understand their reasoning, even if I do not agree. I find that as long as its legal then I am ok with it, because it does not offend me or affect me at all if you have an abortion. 
I have a four year old son, and due to the complications of his birth I am very wary of having another child.  I almost died. For more than just the birth, perhaps the incompetence of the hospital I was in. I do not know for sure, so I am not pointing fingers. Let us just say that it was my body that seemed to not be willing to let me have the child.  I suffered for more than a month after he was born, ended up in the emergency room, needed a transfusion, and had to be heavily medicated for a long time due to all these problems that arose. I will do what I can to prevent a pregnancy, but sometimes, although not often, pregnancy occurs despite of proactive measures.  If that happens then abortion will definitely be considered, not only for my own safety (I am a human being and my life value does not drop just because I have a fetus in my womb) but also due to my own personal choices of not having any more children (which I have a right to make that decision as well).
My Facebook responses were as follows (which turned into somewhat of a debate, and the names are fake, the responses are real):

Jack: 
"I'm pro-choice on abortion rights. It's a womans' body & men should stay the hell out of her decision. Until men can get pregnant, they should not force women to go through a pregnancy a woman doesn't want."

John:
"but what about the man's part of that child ? It takes two to make a child."

Jack : 
"Well, making a woman have an abortion against her will is just as bad as making her carry the pregnancy. Most abortion clinics usually make sure the woman is not being coerced before they begin the procedure. It should be the woman's choice, totally. She is the one carrying the pregnancy not the man."

Me: 

"I think that the father should not always be involved. If the man is a responsible adult, that uses logic as his reasoning, and is a good guy then yes he should be involved, but if the man is a dead beat then he has no say in the matter."

 Jane:

"Neither. I would not recommend an abortion to anyone but I would not speak against it either. My opinion on this would be roughly as follows:
It's a personal choice and should be given good thinking before hand. Deciding to do so can become a weight on the soul, in some cases very traumatizing, and is known to be able to "pop-up" several times afterward - so it should be taken well into consideration whether the woman will be able to "handle it".
The father-to-be (or not) should never pressure a woman in any way to abort for one good reason and this is because they are on average unable to fully understand the psychological consequences of it. I do think the father should have a say in the case that the woman does want an abortion and the father does not, but since he does not go through pregnancy physically it's difficult to say that he should have the right to stop the abortion - though it seems that usually men have less of a problem with it than women.
If people are ready but chose abortion due to laziness, unwillingness to change and fear of the "complications" a baby brings - then I would call that silly, but it would still be their choice.
When girls are getting pregnant and aborting several times, by choice, then I do think they are playing with fire - the mess that is created in the body is probably no joke and by the time they really want a baby it might no longer be possible. Besides if they don't want a baby they should stop getting themselves knocked up, saves a lot of trouble :)
In the case of rape pregnancy it's a dilemma. It's not the unborn baby's fault but it is, of course, extremely traumatizing for the mother who in turn affects the child directly.
So basically: Your choice, your body - consider the positive sides of it but also consider the potential physical and emotional mess."

Judy:
"I agree. I am not pro life or pro choice. I think that there are options out there and they all need to be considered. But it is the woman's choice and I think that if the woman (not the father) should go to some sort of meeting, counselor, or doctor and talk to them and make sure that abortion is the right choice. I also agree again that if a woman has done it several times they (doctors or someone) needs to step in and do something to stop it from happening again. If we are going to have abortion in our country then I think there so be some guide lines. 
I see ya'lls points on the father figure, it depends on the man. It depends on whether he wants to be in the picture or not. If so then they both need to sit down and seriously talk it out to make sure they make the right decision."

Joan:

"Well I honestly hope I don't offend anyone and I respect everyone's opinions, but my religion comes strongly in to play where my opinion is concerned, as well does my personal difficulty with trying to have a baby. As you can see by my pic I have a beautiful baby girl now but it was a long road to get here and that road may not even be an option anymore so the topic of abortion tends to be a touchy one with me, as I'm sure it is with most women who desperately want a child but either can't or have trouble so let me say this:
My Opinion:
I believe abortion is wrong in all cases. I believe that at the moment of conception it is indeed a life created by God and is precious and innocent and wonderful even in that early beginning. A life is not ours to do with as we please. God created us to procreate, not to do as we please or do away with as we please, whatever the case may be. I believe that an abortion does things to the body and the soul that can be traumatic and irreversible. Ok, yes there are circumstances where I can see why people would consider it, rape or medical reasons, but other than those two situations I don't think it should even become part of a woman's thought process. In the event of rape I know how hard that would be but, God has a purpose for every life despite the circumstances in which that life began. The bible says " Even in the womb I knew you." For medical reasons: If it were me I would simply let go and let God, in the end his will shall be done and I would leave it in his capable hands. He has plans for me I may not understand or want to except and those plans may not include my life continuing here, so it's not my choice. And in the end that's how I feel "It's not really my choice, It's his, and who am I to defy?" And let me just say this, I do not Judge or try to impose my views, beliefs, or opinions on others. As I said before, I respect all opinions despite whether or not they are in agreeance with mine. I have only been so open and honest because I know that Johanna will respect mine as well. So I apologize now if I have offended anyone and hope you all have a wonderful night"
Angela:
abortion, is a matter of choice, one can go for it under some kind of situation those are not controllable ,n some go for it as family planning reason. if its just the two reasons as above then its wrong, as baby inside also has a right to see this beautiful world, and ya if u cant raise that baby,due to any reason n want to go for an abortion, then think before conceiving,i think using protection is a better idea,why to let the situation arise to go for an abortion.get mentally prepared wen u want to have a baby,and then only go for having it.its not just an abortion there's life included too.

My response:
To me, its not a matter of when life begins in the womb, its more of the situation of the mother, because it seems like all the sudden the mother isn't important anymore when she is pregnant. I will say that I had MANY complications during my sons birth, and because of that I am very wary of ever having another child. If I were put into a situation to have an abortion I think I could, but of course you never know. Since it is legal for the first trimester I am for it. I am pro-choice, I always have been. I think the option should be available and its not my place to judge whether the woman's reasons justify it. I don't have any religion to tell me that I cant do it, I only go by what I feel is right, and I feel that it is a necessary process nowadays.

 Not only in my status, I found a few responses in my inbox as well, so if you are wondering why adoption has not been brought up... I will say that I had a few women tell me that adoption is the better way.  Those emails were a bit too personal for me to post here. But I must stress that if its physically possible, and if you think you are emotionally stable enough to handle such a thing, then adoption should definitely be considered.  There is always a couple out there that can not have a baby and want to adopt. So that is definitely another route to take.